What causes sexual attraction?

If you want to stop anything from happening i.e an effect, you have to find the cause. Once you put an end to the causes then the effects will automatically stop. Therefore, to stop sexual attraction it is important to know how it arises in the first place.

Thoughts arise in the mind and the mind is made of tubers (karmic). The bigger the tuber, the greater the number of thoughts one will have. It is a fact that there is a tuber of sex; just as a pin gets attracted by a magnet, similarly attraction arises here too.

When the tuber of sexuality sprouts, the result is a sexual impulse. Generally, the impulse is so strong that one becomes engrossed in it i.e. he becomes one with it. If no sexual attraction occurs in this life and when you see a young girl and you feel, ‘This girl is so beautiful, she is so good looking,’ you instantly sow a seed for your next life. With this, sexual attraction will occur in your next life.

Once the tuber of sex is dissolved then there will be no attraction in the worldly interactions. The relationship between a ‘needle’ and a ‘magnet’ would cease. That relationship only exists because of the sexual tubers that have been carried over from the past life.

Have a look at Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan’s vision:

Dadashri: People are all involved in the filth of sex. One does not like presence of light during sexual activity. They get alarmed when the light comes on. Therefore, they keep lights off. If the light falls on the spot of the sexual activity then one would not like that 'place of enjoyment', the organ of sexual interaction. That is why, what has Krupaludev called the 'place of enjoyment'?

Questioner: 'It is not even worth vomiting over'.

Questioner: Yet, what is the reason for being so attracted to that part of the woman's body?

Dadashri: This is due to our wrong belief. Why don't we get attracted to a cow's body part? It is only our belief. There is nothing except for our belief. Destroy that belief and there would not be anything.

Questioner: Do these beliefs arise due to circumstances coming together?

Dadashri: These beliefs arise by what others say to us. Then by supporting those statements, your beliefs become strong. After all, what is in there in it? Just pieces of flesh! 

Certain causes of Sexual Attraction:

1. When the tuber of sexuality sprouts, it results in sexual attraction.
2. A well-nourished body with healthy bones, flesh and blood.
3. It will also arise by looking at images, watching videos, or reading stories that are of a sexual nature.
4. By engaging in imagination and fantasies of a sexual nature.
5. Through eye contact and touching people of the opposite sex.
6. Due to the wrong belief that happiness exists in sex.
7. It is due to the fire of inner restlessness and discontentment. By working all day long, constant inner burning restlessness arises. To quench this fire of restlessness and discontent within, one indulges in transient pleasures of sex.
8. People indulge in it because others do. It is just an imitation of behavior due to societal influence. From time immemorial, the societal norms have been carrying along just in this same fashion and because of that the worldly knowledge has arisen and on top of that a wrong belief and understanding has set in. Now whatever is in one’s belief, that belief will inevitably be reflected in his conduct.
9. As a result of bad company (kusang) of people or friends that encourage sexuality, even jokingly.  
10. Due to the regular practice of human beings involving themselves in sexual interactions, the mind will tend to go back there and delve on it again and again. Thus the vine of sexuality will grow again. Then again the sapling of vishaya will grow.
11. One has never analyzed the sexual event and this is the reason why they still get stuck in it. It is without the analysis that people are confused and keep getting attracted.
12. It is due to lack of understanding. The attraction will continue if the old link of misunderstanding remains that there is happiness in this.
13. You must never say that sexuality is good, and it should not be so in your behavior otherwise such behavior can cause sexual attraction.
14. Repeated protection of sexuality also brings the seed of sexuality to life. ‘What is the harm in sex?’ once this is said, protection of sex is done! Once sexuality is protected, its lifespan is extended!
15. One feels sexual impulses only where one had made the bhaav (sexual intent in previous life). So be aware and uproot the sexual impulse immediately.
16. The reason why one feels the happiness in sex is because one has not experienced happiness anywhere else. If we really look at it, the most filth exists in sexuality rather than anywhere else.

We tend to expect that we will become happy after experiencing sexuality, through either thoughts or actions. We become curious and try new ways to experience sexuality, but in the end, the satisfaction that we had expected, never comes. Therefore, we again look for different ways to get pleasure. This becomes like an addiction, which is never fulfilled and continues like a vicious cycle.