Why negative thinking comes in mind? Why can’t we remain positive always?

Today’s life has become so hectic and fast that everywhere you go or see, people are suffering from work overload, stress, worries and anxiety. Most of the people experience mental unrest. If there is a slight peace of mind, little calmness; then a person can think straight. But in this turmoil, the first thing that comes in mind is the opposite and tend towards negativity and consequently negative emotions. That’s the reason one is not able to remain positive and why negative thinking comes in mind. There are several other reasons that make one toggle towards negative, which are as follows:

Misguided intellect

The main reason behind negativity or negative mindset is misguided intellect (viprit buddhi), and right intellect (samyak buddhi) is for positivity. In the Bhagwad Gita, Lord Krishna has called the misguided intellect a contradictory intellect (vyabhichaarini buddhi), and right intellect as an intellect which binds merit karma (avyabhichaarini buddhi). Finding one negative out of a hundred positives and getting sad, as well as condemning the situation is the misguided intellect. A person with a contrary mind hurts himself and hurts everyone else around them. Whereas, right intellect finds one positive out of hundred negatives, identify happiness out of sorrow.

Most of the time, the misguided intellect leads us to act incorrectly and immerses us deeper in wrongdoings. Whereas, right intellect helps us rise and correct our path when we are headed in the wrong direction. There is always a continuous struggle between misguided and right intellect, respectively. However, in the current era (Kaliyug), misguided intellect mostly prevails, which is why it tends to dominate. As a result, one is unable to remain positive at all times. Where the heart is involved, one becomes positive, but where intellect is used, negativity prevails. Because intellect always shows, “my benefit”, “my gain,” or “what will bring me happiness?”

Opinion

Most of the times, we are inclined to see negative of the people that are so close to us. Because, being close to each other day and night there are always clashes here and there, failed to adjust with each other, and might have hurt each other as well. As a result, a negative opinion is formed for the person that, “this is how they are”, “that’s what they do all the time”, etc. This is another common reason why negative thinking comes in mind.

There are two types of opinions for individuals, both positive and negative. But oftentimes, one has more negative opinions for other people rather than positive, due to people being so close; one leans towards speaking more negatively than positively. The more negative opinions we have for a person, the more hatred, pain, and suffering will arise, and those negative vibrations will also reach the other person.

Having destructive criticism

We see everyone’s fault based on our viewpoint. For example, “He keeps doing that. He should not do that.” So we feel negative for that individual.

It is our wrong understanding makes us see faults of others. This is a subtle reason why negative thinking comes in mind. If someone tells us “stop talking” and stops us in the middle while we are still talking, we get upset immediately, we see fault of that person, and might end up quarreling with them. But let’s suppose, the microphone runs out of battery while we are recording and we have to stop speaking, then? We do not see anyone’s fault or negative at that time, nor do we get angry. When adverse situations arise, whether due to a person or a situation, if a positive vision is maintained, no faults are seen.

Wrong understanding leads to negative, while right understanding leads to positive. So if we change our viewpoint, we can remain positive even in the negative circumstances.

Inner enemies of anger, pride, deceit and greed

The biggest reason behind seeing anyone’s negative are clashes. Those are, our own anger, pride, attachment, and greed. If someone insults us slightly, like belittling or ignoring us in front of others, our pride makes us see negative for others. If someone slightly provokes our ego, then it will not keep us away from seeing negative of others.

In the same manner, our desires or expectations are not fulfilled; like, when we want something and don’t get it, we see negative. Slight disruption in our happiness causes us to see negative.

Our own selfish intellect, greed, expectations, hunger for pride, our own infatuation, ultimately lead us to the negative.

Societal influence

The development of seeing negative within us begins from childhood by observing others. For example, if a young child comes home crying after being hit by his friends, his mother might say, “What kind of boy are you? Came home after getting hit. Couldn’t you hit them back a few times?” The knowledge gained in childhood influences the child’s behavior as he grows older. However, if the child is taught a positive vision from a young age, then positive behavior will emerge and remain as he grows older. 

Root cause of negativity

At the root of a negative viewpoint lies a negative ego. When the ego is nurtured, one feels positive, but when the ego is hurt, one feels negative. If everything goes according to one’s expectations, the ego proudly boasts, “I managed this so well!” But when things go against expectations, one becomes frustrated and negative. This is also why negative thinking comes in mind.

The ego is constantly striving to prove, “How I am better, superior to others, and how is the other person worse than me.” The intellect perpetually engages in comparisons to support this. The ego feels justified only when it belittles others or speaks negatively about them, thus confirming its superiority. Therefore, negativity fundamentally arises from the ego itself.